Tuesday, September 22, 2009

A Snowy Day
My face forms in to a heartwarming smile as my dog, Buddy runs around in the snow. We play laugh play and make snow angles and have a happy day, a snowy day.
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3 comments:

  1. Olivia KallaiSeptember 23, 2009 at 2:57 PM

    That is a really great post. I like how you gave alot of detail but not so much you overwelm the reader.

    Your true friend, Olivia Rose

    ReplyDelete
  2. MaggieSeptember 23, 2009 at 7:20 PM

    Play around with your line breaks and see how it changes your poem. See if you think your poem feels different to you in these two examples. All of the words are yours, I just played with the line breaks. There's not a right answer, it's about what feels right to you.

    A Snowy Day
    My face forms in to a heartwarming smile
    as my dog, Buddy, runs around in the snow.
    We play laugh play and make snow angles
    and have a happy day, a snowy day.

    or --

    A Snowy Day
    My face forms
    in to a heartwarming smile
    as my dog
    Buddy
    runs around
    in the snow.
    We play
    laugh
    play
    and make snow angles
    and have
    a happy day,
    a snowy day.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Olivia KallaiSeptember 24, 2009 at 7:49 PM

    Hey maggie and Haley try reading my post The Wind, and Haley this one is great I like the where you said a "happy day, a snowy day" that makes the poem sound cool.

    Your tue friend, Olivia Rose

    ReplyDelete

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